You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Texas’ tag.

Kexit – resolving to no longer wear underwear

Rexit – leaving the dog park for the joys and ease of being a cat owner

Chexit – no more processed breakfast cereals for me

Vexit – you’re really starting to annoy me; I’m outta here

Sexit – a real life version of Lysistrata

Fexit – giving up on my attempts to put on an Irish accent, complete with profanity

Skrillexit – so long, celebrity DJs, I’m listening to folk music from now on!

Pexit – giving up on exercise when you realize having a six pack isn’t worth the trouble

Texit – deciding to not bother messing with Texas, but just leaving it to itself

Hexit – witches, wiccans, whatever–you can’t put a spell on me

Mexitco – when Mexico takes Vicente Fox’s cue and finally tells Trump to go fuck himself

Nexit – whatever the next exit may be, wherever it may happen

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United States

“Those Marines who urinated on the dead Taliban shouldn’t face criminal charges–they’re just 18 or 19-year old kids, after all. It’s not like they’re mentally handicapped, who I believe are fully responsible, and should be punished to the full extent of the law, including the death penalty.” -Rick Perry, Governor of Texas

Syria

“Hello? Is anyone out there? Would you help protect us if we told you we had oil?” -Syrian citizens everywhere

Canada

“Big Environment is out to destroy this country, and destroy jobs, and Ethical Oil and the Conservative Party are the only ones standing in the way. Won’t you please call your MP and let them know that you’re sick of buying oil from the Middle East, that it’s time we support Canadian jobs by raping our own environment? Oh, and boycott bananas!” -EthicalOil.org

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