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He related to everyone and everything as if they were mature adults. As this was pretty much impossible, he was fairly unsuccessful. Not everything, after all, is a mature adult. Dogs and cats, for example, to say nothing of children, or for that matter cars. Cars, especially.

He wanted to have rational, and as much as possible non-emotional, discourse with the world around him. So with precocious (which it goes without saying and is a totally different story altogether) children, he did quite alright, at least until the child decided that he was tired of being grown-up after all and just wanted his blankie. Cars that worked, too, were no problem, but don’t get me started on that. Dogs that could shake hands and keep their opinions to themselves were okay in his book, but otherwise not much good having around. You couldn’t very well have a chat with Rover about the situation in the Middle East or even the state of the Dodgers’ pitching staff.

That ability to at least temporarily put oneself into the mind of another that we call empathy was, to put it shortly, decidedly lacking.

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United States

“Those Marines who urinated on the dead Taliban shouldn’t face criminal charges–they’re just 18 or 19-year old kids, after all. It’s not like they’re mentally handicapped, who I believe are fully responsible, and should be punished to the full extent of the law, including the death penalty.” -Rick Perry, Governor of Texas

Syria

“Hello? Is anyone out there? Would you help protect us if we told you we had oil?” -Syrian citizens everywhere

Canada

“Big Environment is out to destroy this country, and destroy jobs, and Ethical Oil and the Conservative Party are the only ones standing in the way. Won’t you please call your MP and let them know that you’re sick of buying oil from the Middle East, that it’s time we support Canadian jobs by raping our own environment? Oh, and boycott bananas!” -EthicalOil.org

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